It’s Friday. Metrics of this blog indicate that readership on Friday tails off and stays down for the weekend, then comes back on Monday.

What? Are you cheeky monkeys reading this while on company time? How can you live with yourself? Just fine? Hmm. OK.

So, today I’m going to ramble a bit on two topics.

LeBron James. And Juan Pierre.

OK, LeBron. He and the Cleveland Cavaliers were excused from the NBA playoffs by the Boston Celtics in six games, meaning that seven seasons into his NBA career the “world’s greatest player” has one finals appearance … and zero championships.

I think it is long since time to say “win something and then we’ll talk.” Not some individual award.  Not some Q rating test. A championship. You know, like Kobe and Dwyane Wade and Tim Duncan and Kevin Garnett. Win something. Until you do, you’re kind of a tricked up Harlem Globetrotter. You do amazing stuff with the ball, but you’re not a serious player with a serious contender, and when you get someone tougher than the Washington Generals in the playoffs, you have issues.

So go play wherever, and bring home a title. Until then, I will be more interested in guys who play for a serious team.

And Juan Pierre. Did you think I was talking about Juan Marichal or Juan Samuel?

I have criticized Juanster the Monster in the past, mostly in the context of the Dodgers and what a mistake Ned Colletti made to sign him to a five-year, $44 million contract before the 2007 season.

But now we have this: Juan was offloaded to the Chicago White Sox before the season, and the White Sox are paying about half of the final two years of that deal, and what has he done for the Chisox?

Nothing. Or nearly nothing. Worse than nothing, most days.

Juan is on pace for a shockingly bad season. Worthy of the Dead Ball Era a century ago.

Through Thursday, Juan was putting up some astonishingly feeble numbers. Worse than his worst stretch with the Dodgers who, in this case, are far better off paying half of his salary with the White Sox just to be rid of the guy. A good investment because you don’t want this guy on your team. As a hitter. Not as a person, because he is a good guy. He just can’t play.

Anyway, look at these numbers:  135 at-bats, 16 runs,  34 hits, 17 steals (and here comes the stunning/appalling stuff) one extra-base hit, three RBI, a .308 on-base percentage.

Projected out over the whole season, Juan will … have 639 at-bats, score 76 runs (a bit low for a leadoff guy), have 161 hits … and now he falls off a cliff again … rap five doubles, zero triples and zero homers, and drive in 14 runs (in 639 at-bats, remember).

That is, Juan Pierre may be on track for one of the worst seasons in baseball history in terms of run production.

How feeble is he that a guy who runs as well as he does can have only one double? Can’t he hit one down the line? Flare one behind a corner bag? It is almost unimaginable that he has one double 135 at-bats.

The Dodgers are lucky they don’t have him. He would be a leaking wound.

He remains a good guy, but a guy who can’t play.  Though he does have one championship ring, with Florida, 2003.

That is,  one more championship than LeBron James.